Inbox for Fade Rift

[justice_is_blond]

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[arlathvhen]

Zevran knows me, he knows me better than anyone outside of my clan, maybe even better than certain people from my clan.

[ And that is problematic, because Zevran knows her flaws. He knows the ugly parts of her that she carefully hides, and he knows all the ways that she wouldn't be good enough for Alistair, and Zevran would surely only want the best for him.

But that's not helping the conversation. Going into a downward spiral about her various issues will do the opposite of help. ]

All of that--It's good advice. [ Even if it's a lot easier said than done. And doesn't take into account the risk of crying, freaking out, and maybe just kicking Alistair in the knee. ] Thank you. You didn't have to, ah. Talk me through this. But I appreciate that you did. I know I get a little, um. Much.

I just...really want this to work out. It's one of the first things that I've wanted, for myself. Something selfish.

[justice_is_blond]

I understand. I spent... I spent a very long time ignoring anything I might want.

[And much he needed.]

And something about here gives the freedom to explore, but also the freedom to be hurt. If it doesn't work out, Beleth, you still have a friend who is dependable and true for all that he deflects. You've still gained. It's something that's not always easy to remember, but it is important.

[arlathvhen]

I...I don't know. There's something different, after that. The way you interact is different. Because now he knows how you feel, and you know how he feels, and that--it changes things. It was, um. It was like that with the last person I tried telling.

Maybe that's just my fault. It was hard to be around him, after that.

[justice_is_blond]

I think it only changes things if you dwell on it, if you dwell on what you can't have at the exclusion of what you do. Here's the thing, Beleth. If you don't tell him and he figures it out, things will be weird anyway. He'll wonder why you didn't say, wish you would so it would be out there, and so on. If you tell him, and remember that he's valuable to you as "just" a friend, as long as he is, then it doesn't have to be weird.

You'll still have feelings. They won't simply vanish. But you have control of them.

[arlathvhen]

...You're right.

[ Would she prefer to lose Alistair as a friend? No. Never. ]

Thank you, Anders. I'm sorry that I've been so...difficult.

[justice_is_blond]

You're welcome, Beleth, and you've not been difficult. I only hope I helped.