Anders (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
justice_is_blond) wrote2016-01-15 11:45 am
justice_is_blond) wrote2016-01-15 11:45 am
Inbox for Fade Rift
[Please leave a message after the beep that doesn't actually exist.]
[The kiss is more than welcome and Cyril tilts his head into it. As he does, his hand moves to settle on Anders' arm. When Anders pulls back to speak Cyril looks up at him with a small smile.]
I do try.
[There's so much truth in that. He tries very hard to look fantastic, even the tilt to his head is to make him look more enticing.]
You look pretty delicious yourself.
[He leans up into another kiss, this time it's stronger than the chaste little peck that Anders gave him.]
I do try.
[There's so much truth in that. He tries very hard to look fantastic, even the tilt to his head is to make him look more enticing.]
You look pretty delicious yourself.
[He leans up into another kiss, this time it's stronger than the chaste little peck that Anders gave him.]
[No. Everything is not all right. Nathaniel doesn't need to come up with a dozen good reasons not to pursue Anders, just one bad one and one good one.
The bad one is not wanting to wind up like his parents did in their miserable, toxic marriage.
The good one is Justice. Courting Anders would mean courting Justice. And there may yet come a day when Justice will have to be killed without Anders' knowledge or consent. A betrayal like that would be so much worse if they were...together.
Anders can't know how he feels. If he does, he'll feel beholden somehow, like he owes Nathaniel something he doesn't. Leave it, then. Leave it for that elusive day when there is no Justice and re-evaluate then. By then, he might have some idea what there is to even tell him.]
I'm not sure, [he says honestly.] I have never been with anyone if I knew I was going to see them again. I'm not sure what happens now.
The bad one is not wanting to wind up like his parents did in their miserable, toxic marriage.
The good one is Justice. Courting Anders would mean courting Justice. And there may yet come a day when Justice will have to be killed without Anders' knowledge or consent. A betrayal like that would be so much worse if they were...together.
Anders can't know how he feels. If he does, he'll feel beholden somehow, like he owes Nathaniel something he doesn't. Leave it, then. Leave it for that elusive day when there is no Justice and re-evaluate then. By then, he might have some idea what there is to even tell him.]
I'm not sure, [he says honestly.] I have never been with anyone if I knew I was going to see them again. I'm not sure what happens now.
[It's a relief and a sting both. Anders and Justice both work to wipe out that little twinge of pain - he would drag down anyone who was with him, or he would hurt them, or someone else would hurt them to hurt him as has been done before and so harshly. This is safer for Nate, and so he needs to be glad of it.]
What happens is that now we know the other is attracted and an option. We're friends with... additional activity options.
[His voice is light and pleasant as he works to embrace the relief alone. This is why he needs to not be so stupidly fast to start wanting things.]
Publicly nothing changes.
[Which protects Nate.]
Which means I'm still going to shamelessly flirt with you. And now you know that if you respond to the flirting, you can have me.
[Protecting Nate is good, and that helps him finally gain the acceptance he needs here. He's not losing anything. He is, in fact, gaining a lover, without endangering said lover. This is a win.]
What happens is that now we know the other is attracted and an option. We're friends with... additional activity options.
[His voice is light and pleasant as he works to embrace the relief alone. This is why he needs to not be so stupidly fast to start wanting things.]
Publicly nothing changes.
[Which protects Nate.]
Which means I'm still going to shamelessly flirt with you. And now you know that if you respond to the flirting, you can have me.
[Protecting Nate is good, and that helps him finally gain the acceptance he needs here. He's not losing anything. He is, in fact, gaining a lover, without endangering said lover. This is a win.]
Publicly people have already seen me shove you up against a tree. And I'm fair certain anyone in the Warden camp heard us. And a number of people out of it.
[You can have me. It's a lovely thought, but also feels a little dishonest, having Anders without telling him of his feelings. Though if all physical relationships relied on complete and utter frankness, nobody would ever get laid.
His eyes find something across the tent to fall on. A moment of silence passes.]
I'd...like to ask something. In the interest of honesty.
[You can have me. It's a lovely thought, but also feels a little dishonest, having Anders without telling him of his feelings. Though if all physical relationships relied on complete and utter frankness, nobody would ever get laid.
His eyes find something across the tent to fall on. A moment of silence passes.]
I'd...like to ask something. In the interest of honesty.
Of course.
[There's a flash of a smile again, against Nate's skin, at the mention of the tree. That had been absolutely delicious. He's going to need to provoke Nate like that again sometime, maybe when they're off in the trees alone... and he's getting sidetracked.]
Ask anything you'd like. And people will gossip about the tree and forget about it.
[Likely the next time Zevran shoves Anders against something they'll have entirely forgotten Nate had.]
[There's a flash of a smile again, against Nate's skin, at the mention of the tree. That had been absolutely delicious. He's going to need to provoke Nate like that again sometime, maybe when they're off in the trees alone... and he's getting sidetracked.]
Ask anything you'd like. And people will gossip about the tree and forget about it.
[Likely the next time Zevran shoves Anders against something they'll have entirely forgotten Nate had.]
[He goes still, trying to process what that means.]
Are...
[There's only one way to take it. It's not an 'in the event.' There is something, Nathaniel feels something, but he doesn't want to be with an abomination.
And Anders may never be separated from Justice.]
You suggested it.
[His voice is small, a little hurt.]
You'd...
[Nate had the idea that he merge with Justice and Anders has never held it against the archer, because who could have known what would happen, but this is incredibly not fair if he's reading between the lines. Anders sags against Nate. But can he really blame the man? Anders is possessed, and Nate and Justice had never liked each other. Anders had recently reminded Nate of this, even, and he's just gone through the mental notes about how this is safer if they're not attached.]
Are...
[There's only one way to take it. It's not an 'in the event.' There is something, Nathaniel feels something, but he doesn't want to be with an abomination.
And Anders may never be separated from Justice.]
You suggested it.
[His voice is small, a little hurt.]
You'd...
[Nate had the idea that he merge with Justice and Anders has never held it against the archer, because who could have known what would happen, but this is incredibly not fair if he's reading between the lines. Anders sags against Nate. But can he really blame the man? Anders is possessed, and Nate and Justice had never liked each other. Anders had recently reminded Nate of this, even, and he's just gone through the mental notes about how this is safer if they're not attached.]
[It takes him a second to realize what Anders means. His eyes widen.]
That--no. I--Anders. [His face burns. He should have said it differently.]
There is nothing wrong with you as you are. Nothing. But I...I don't want you to be torn between him and me. It's not that I wouldn't want you. It's that you have too many powerful forces trying to influence you as it is, him and others. You don't need another.
[So many things could go wrong, so many ways Nathaniel could mishandle it without knowing.]
I don't want...to be in a position where I could hurt you.
That--no. I--Anders. [His face burns. He should have said it differently.]
There is nothing wrong with you as you are. Nothing. But I...I don't want you to be torn between him and me. It's not that I wouldn't want you. It's that you have too many powerful forces trying to influence you as it is, him and others. You don't need another.
[So many things could go wrong, so many ways Nathaniel could mishandle it without knowing.]
I don't want...to be in a position where I could hurt you.
[He needs a few moments to breathe and reprocess everything that's being said, still curled up and feeling a thousand different emotions. He's not entirely sure he follows the point Nate is making, but he'll cling to Nate saying it's not that he's an abomination, at least.]
All right.
[His voice is quiet, and he's filled with regret and questions he can't ask. How long has Nate felt things for him? Why didn't he even hint at it? Why... A dozen whys and they'll not be voiced.]
All right.
[He needs to focus and keep from hoping, push it down, because there's not a lot of hope when it comes to being unpossessed anyway. This is something that will not happen, and he has to accept that no matter how he wants things to go differently.]
You'd... You'd likely be hurt too. It's better this way.
[Still trying to convince himself, but he'll manage.]
All right.
[His voice is quiet, and he's filled with regret and questions he can't ask. How long has Nate felt things for him? Why didn't he even hint at it? Why... A dozen whys and they'll not be voiced.]
All right.
[He needs to focus and keep from hoping, push it down, because there's not a lot of hope when it comes to being unpossessed anyway. This is something that will not happen, and he has to accept that no matter how he wants things to go differently.]
You'd... You'd likely be hurt too. It's better this way.
[Still trying to convince himself, but he'll manage.]
[He hadn't expected Anders to seem this hurt. But Anders doesn't know the last resort is still an option. Anders doesn't know Justice is going, one way or another.
That's why they can't be together.
He kisses Anders' brow.]
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you.
[THIS IS WHAT HE MEANS love is so dumb and it's too easy to hurt someone.]
That's why they can't be together.
He kisses Anders' brow.]
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you.
[THIS IS WHAT HE MEANS love is so dumb and it's too easy to hurt someone.]
You, bent back, spread wide, and begging. Writhing under me as I fill you over and over, twisting so deep that you can feel me in the back of your throat-
[ His breath catches, here, as his own fingers twist and press in deep, ripping a moan from him that cracks the next word in half. ]
Unbearable.
[ His breath catches, here, as his own fingers twist and press in deep, ripping a moan from him that cracks the next word in half. ]
Unbearable.
[He doesn't say it's all right because he's not all right, but he can accept this in time. At the end of the day, Anders doesn't want to drag someone else down or see them hurt because of him. It's just hard to know that he could have love except it's dangling just out of reach, possibly for good.
Anders closes his eyes and leans there, listening to Nate's heart beat.]
I know. I know you didn't.
[He'll take what Nate is willing to give him. It's still more than he expected.]
Anders closes his eyes and leans there, listening to Nate's heart beat.]
I know. I know you didn't.
[He'll take what Nate is willing to give him. It's still more than he expected.]
[ continued from here. ]
Mmm...well, if you insist.
[ As though it is so great a burden. Zevran sets the customary scarf outside is door so no one wanders in unannounced and interrupts them. This is not quite so in depth as a full, proper lay and in honesty?
A bit of a fond farewell to the fun he has had with Anders. He knows a complication when he sees one. Avoiding such things has been a valuable life skill. ]
Mmm...well, if you insist.
[ As though it is so great a burden. Zevran sets the customary scarf outside is door so no one wanders in unannounced and interrupts them. This is not quite so in depth as a full, proper lay and in honesty?
A bit of a fond farewell to the fun he has had with Anders. He knows a complication when he sees one. Avoiding such things has been a valuable life skill. ]
Nathaniel strips off his cloak and spreads it over the ground, a serviceable bed atop the clean coating of pine needles. He takes Anders' hand and tugs him down to kneel on the cloak, kneeling with him and resuming his attentions down his throat. He wants to take Anders on his back, so his lover can see the wide-open sky and the quiet pines and know he is free, and not all the world is against him.
[for reference, from here]
On a cloak laid out for him as kisses are trailed down his throat by this glorious man who has feelings for him. No, this is a dream, and he's not complaining. His fingers thread through Nate's hair as he sighs, feeling dangerously close to happy.
"This isn't making your case for you. The not-a-dream one. The opposite, really." He tilts his head to manage to kiss the side of Nate's without getting in the way of the delicious lips on his throat, because just about the last thing he wants to do is disturb that. It feels so good, so attentive and caring. It's better than his dreams, even.
On a cloak laid out for him as kisses are trailed down his throat by this glorious man who has feelings for him. No, this is a dream, and he's not complaining. His fingers thread through Nate's hair as he sighs, feeling dangerously close to happy.
"This isn't making your case for you. The not-a-dream one. The opposite, really." He tilts his head to manage to kiss the side of Nate's without getting in the way of the delicious lips on his throat, because just about the last thing he wants to do is disturb that. It feels so good, so attentive and caring. It's better than his dreams, even.
"I can do a few things your dreams cannot," Nathaniel mumbles between kisses, and to demonstrate, he bares Anders' shoulder and begins to suck and worry a mark there. His hand squeezes a thigh firmly. Something about this skin, so smooth and fragrant. It drives him wild, makes him plan things he never considered. This strange, conflicted man, so kind at heart and high-spirited, who would give of himself to protect him, exquisite and wretched, is running away with his heart. He doesn't care if others call him foolish. He knows Anders' demons, the figurative and literal ones. He has seen them and is unafraid. Everyone has demons. Better the ones Nathaniel sees and knows.
Aye, well, I'll admit I'm not always good at it, but...
[His shoulders lift in a shrug, but it comes along with a small, slightly wry smile.]
If we're going to be friends, listening to your side of things is part of that, I'd say. Besides, it's not as though as I've not done things to try and change bad situations myself.
[His shoulders lift in a shrug, but it comes along with a small, slightly wry smile.]
If we're going to be friends, listening to your side of things is part of that, I'd say. Besides, it's not as though as I've not done things to try and change bad situations myself.
"Clearly you can." His voice is low, heated. He's never had someone start a mark on him before. He's never had someone want to and this is so many firsts right here, already. The amount of emotion tied into this makes him a little jumpy, a little tense, but he breathes, working through it. This isn't a trick or a joke, and Nathaniel can never be made Tranquil, has every right to defend himself, has every ability to defend himself.
Anders keeps one hand on the back of Nate's head, playing with his hair, encouraging everything the archer is doing while assuring himself that this is real. Nate's real. His other hand follows the curve of Nate's neck and shoulder, feeling what he cannot see at this moment, starting to memorize it.
"You are breathtaking."
Anders keeps one hand on the back of Nate's head, playing with his hair, encouraging everything the archer is doing while assuring himself that this is real. Nate's real. His other hand follows the curve of Nate's neck and shoulder, feeling what he cannot see at this moment, starting to memorize it.
"You are breathtaking."
When the mark is bright and vivid, Nathaniel lifts Anders' robe over his head, folds it carefully, and sets it on an empty portion of cloak. Last time was a heated, needy thing. This time, he is going to show Anders how special he is.
He kisses down one arm to the hand, then each finger. The same treatment is given to the other arm. He kisses down Anders' chest to his heart, and pauses to listen. His hands glide over his stomach as he takes a nipple into his mouth and teases it to hardness.
He kisses down one arm to the hand, then each finger. The same treatment is given to the other arm. He kisses down Anders' chest to his heart, and pauses to listen. His hands glide over his stomach as he takes a nipple into his mouth and teases it to hardness.
His breath catches, Nate living up to what Anders had just said, as he's slowly kissed. By the time his heart is being listened to it's pounding up a storm.
"You... Oh." It had been obvious Nate had feelings from the 'in the event of' talk, clear he'd felt strongly from the moment he'd been willing to be with Anders despite Justice, but now, now Anders is starting to feel the scope of things and it's going to his heart even faster than it's going to his cock.
"There is no one who comes close to you." He feels adored right now, precious, with each careful touch and bit of attention. Anders starts undoing Nate's tunic, tugging the leather open and urging it off the archer before pulling off belt and undertunic as well. It's hard to copy Nate's careful folding when his pulse feels strong enough to create an earthquake, but the end result doesn't matter when it's tidy enough and he has the man's chest bare enough that he can drag nails lightly down his sides.
"No one."
"You... Oh." It had been obvious Nate had feelings from the 'in the event of' talk, clear he'd felt strongly from the moment he'd been willing to be with Anders despite Justice, but now, now Anders is starting to feel the scope of things and it's going to his heart even faster than it's going to his cock.
"There is no one who comes close to you." He feels adored right now, precious, with each careful touch and bit of attention. Anders starts undoing Nate's tunic, tugging the leather open and urging it off the archer before pulling off belt and undertunic as well. It's hard to copy Nate's careful folding when his pulse feels strong enough to create an earthquake, but the end result doesn't matter when it's tidy enough and he has the man's chest bare enough that he can drag nails lightly down his sides.
"No one."
[He can feel the mood. It's not the usual heated charge. Instead, it's something a little more subdued, a little more... accepting, perhaps, is the word for it. There's been a change, and Anders is near-certain he can peg it on Nate. But he won't dwell. Far better to enjoy the moment, and Anders steps close to Zevran to seek out the elf's lips hungrily.]
I most definitely insisted. I've enjoyed the taste of your lips.
[In the interest of not making an absolute mess of his robes, Anders starts undoing them and drops them off to the side before settling on the bed, sitting forward so Zevran can take a seat behind him.]
I most definitely insisted. I've enjoyed the taste of your lips.
[In the interest of not making an absolute mess of his robes, Anders starts undoing them and drops them off to the side before settling on the bed, sitting forward so Zevran can take a seat behind him.]
[ As he will be taking point with all else- he allows Anders to take point in the kiss. Parts his lips and yields sweetly before he takes control on the bed. part of him will miss this- the focus, the passion, the faint taste of honey and ozone.
The rest of him is pleased that Anders has found someone to care for deeply.
With one last chaste aftershock he slips free of his boots, sliding about to settle behind Anders on his bed. He loops his arms casually about Anders' waist, tucks his chin over his shoulder, and breathes. ]
Mmm...how to start. Is there anything in particular you wish to hear? Some sordid fantasy?
The rest of him is pleased that Anders has found someone to care for deeply.
With one last chaste aftershock he slips free of his boots, sliding about to settle behind Anders on his bed. He loops his arms casually about Anders' waist, tucks his chin over his shoulder, and breathes. ]
Mmm...how to start. Is there anything in particular you wish to hear? Some sordid fantasy?
Nathaniel hums softly as he switches to the other nipple, fingers trailing down his sides, then catching his leggings and pulling them down. He doesn't touch his cock yet, instead caressing the length of his legs, over and over until the second nipple is sufficiently hard. Lips touch at his navel; he nuzzles, kisses, breathes over the skin of his belly, then draws back, lifting an ankle to his shoulder and kissing there and upward, the opposite of his attentions on his arms. The other leg receives the same treatment. At the end, both legs are over Nathaniel's shoulders, and he is poised with his lips at the base of Anders' elegant cock.
His attentions here must be careful, stoking and building desire without fulfilling. There are kisses with barely a flash of tongue as he works his way to the tip, then back down.
His attentions here must be careful, stoking and building desire without fulfilling. There are kisses with barely a flash of tongue as he works his way to the tip, then back down.
[Anders relaxes, feeling secure in the hold, relaxed. It's still amazing that he can yield so easily to anyone, but especially an assassin. This assassin, though. This one has honor. This one has Anders' trust.]
Mm. Maybe something I've never tried, put my imagination and your descriptive skills to the test. Something Nate would never come up with.
[He realizes he has no idea what sort of experience or interests Nate has besides him. He'd shown a great deal of skill and precision, but kinks? Anders has no clue.]
Just... No restraints.
Mm. Maybe something I've never tried, put my imagination and your descriptive skills to the test. Something Nate would never come up with.
[He realizes he has no idea what sort of experience or interests Nate has besides him. He'd shown a great deal of skill and precision, but kinks? Anders has no clue.]
Just... No restraints.
He makes a quiet noise, shivering as he's exposed to the chilled air though it's driven away quickly by the heat of Nate's body, the touches and the kisses. It's near-impossible for him to stay quiet but words are getting difficult so little noises will have to suffice.
All of it stops, though, including his breath, as Nate poises so close to his cock. His lips are barely able to form the start of the word 'please' before Nate starts kissing him and his head falls back to the cloak. Nate's lips and tongue are marvelous beyond description... and they're being used to tease.
"Did you like me begging that much?" He flashes a very turned-on smile, reaching down and running his fingers appreciatively through Nate's hair, practically bending himself in half. "I can do it again."
All of it stops, though, including his breath, as Nate poises so close to his cock. His lips are barely able to form the start of the word 'please' before Nate starts kissing him and his head falls back to the cloak. Nate's lips and tongue are marvelous beyond description... and they're being used to tease.
"Did you like me begging that much?" He flashes a very turned-on smile, reaching down and running his fingers appreciatively through Nate's hair, practically bending himself in half. "I can do it again."
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